The Crisis that Grief
Brings in Marriage
Brings in Marriage
Did you and your spouse just experience a mind-numbing, tragic event in your lives as a couple? Are you overcoming grief alone or with your spouse? What must you know about overcoming grief and keeping your relationship strong at this trying time?
Grief is an overwhelming and multidimensional reaction to loss. Even if you have the most loving relationship, you may experience rocky times when faced with grief. The causes of grief vary and there are too many to list here.
The Grieving Couple
Grief for you as a couple can be complicated. It is a subjective thing because your spouse will grieve in a different way from you. You will adapt to the loss at a rate and in a manner that’s subjectively and personally unique from one another. This can unduly strain your marital relationship regardless of how strong it is. Perceived guilt or having been unable to stop the tragic loss can increase the negative feelings. The crisis that enters your marriage is a crisis that impacts your entire family.
The Grieving Wife
Some women weep and grieve openly. Many talk about their pain and share it with relatives and close friends. A mother who lost a child would have a profound need to remember the child. She will pore over old picture albums, videos and other things reminding her of her child. She will resent that her husband is not grieving or that he refuses to talk about their child. She will have difficulty understanding why he would prefer to be out of the house buried in his own world.
The Grieving Husband
Most husbands are looked upon as the fixer and provider of the family. Unfortunately, there are family tragedies that are beyond his control that he cannot fix. Not usually displaying emotion, he may try to hide his feelings. With a grieving wife, his primary support system, he may seek solace in his work or a hobby to stay preoccupied, retreating and abandoning the grief-stricken wife in the process even without meaning to.
Learning to Acknowledge and Respect Differences
Despite the big strain on your relationship, your marriage or relationship is not doomed. You can work on your communication so you can share your grief. You can learn and absorb different ways of overcoming grief. Because this will not be an easy stage for you, your spouse and other children, this may be one of the times you need help.
It is important to recognize the importance of a counselor at this time in your marriage. At Carolina Counseling Services, we have several marriage/family therapists who can help you face your grief together as a couple. Call us for an appointment so we can show you there’s light at the end of the dark tunnel you’re in.
Did you and your spouse just experience a mind-numbing, tragic event in your lives as a couple? Are you overcoming grief alone or with your spouse? What must you know about overcoming grief and keeping your relationship strong at this trying time?
Grief is an overwhelming and multidimensional reaction to loss. Even if you have the most loving relationship, you may experience rocky times when faced with grief. The causes of grief vary and there are too many to list here.
The Grieving Couple
Grief for you as a couple can be complicated. It is a subjective thing because your spouse will grieve in a different way from you. You will adapt to the loss at a rate and in a manner that’s subjectively and personally unique from one another. This can unduly strain your marital relationship regardless of how strong it is. Perceived guilt or having been unable to stop the tragic loss can increase the negative feelings. The crisis that enters your marriage is a crisis that impacts your entire family.
The Grieving Wife
Some women weep and grieve openly. Many talk about their pain and share it with relatives and close friends. A mother who lost a child would have a profound need to remember the child. She will pore over old picture albums, videos and other things reminding her of her child. She will resent that her husband is not grieving or that he refuses to talk about their child. She will have difficulty understanding why he would prefer to be out of the house buried in his own world.
The Grieving Husband
Most husbands are looked upon as the fixer and provider of the family. Unfortunately, there are family tragedies that are beyond his control that he cannot fix. Not usually displaying emotion, he may try to hide his feelings. With a grieving wife, his primary support system, he may seek solace in his work or a hobby to stay preoccupied, retreating and abandoning the grief-stricken wife in the process even without meaning to.
Learning to Acknowledge and Respect Differences
Despite the big strain on your relationship, your marriage or relationship is not doomed. You can work on your communication so you can share your grief. You can learn and absorb different ways of overcoming grief. Because this will not be an easy stage for you, your spouse and other children, this may be one of the times you need help.
It is important to recognize the importance of a counselor at this time in your marriage. At Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC we have several marriage/family therapists who can help you face your grief together as a couple. Call us for an appointment so we can show you there’s light at the end of the dark tunnel you’re in.