The Positive Force of Counseling:
Transforming Negative Experiences

Sometimes life throws an unexpected curveball in your direction. Everyone’s curveballs are different: Your romantic relationship just ended. Your career is taking a downward turn. You or a family member are diagnosed with a serious illness. You lose someone close to you. These negative experiences can happen at any time and make you want to raise your hands in surrender.

When you’re distressed by unfortunate events, you may become inclined to close yourself off to the world, dwell on your pain and unhappiness, and lose interest in potentially rewarding life experiences. Doing this will not make you feel better. Instead, being open, honest, and willing to receive help can make a huge difference.

Cultivating Healthy Positivity

Too often we expect ourselves to “just be positive” and then we will all of a sudden magically feel better. Not only is this unrealistic, this type of thinking can be toxic. Trying to only think positively isn’t something that comes naturally to us, and for good reason. 

There are negative things that happen in our lives. We feel “negative” emotions, to deny this can cause more harm than good. When we have a healthy level of positivity we are able to acknowledge both the positive and the negative. 

You cannot thing positively all the time just as you cannot think negatively all day long either. Finding a healthy balance and allowing space for both can lead growth and positive change. Counseling can help you to explore the way you think and what you believe. Approaches like those utilized in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) can teach you valuable skills that help to create a healthier, more realistic narrative. 

Channeling the “Negative” 

It is natural to feel uncomfortable or painful emotions. These feelings tend to be categorized as “good” or “bad”. The reality is that emotions simply are what they are. They aren’t good and they aren’t bad. What we do with them is what determines whether they work for us or against us. 

Anger can be channeled into creativity. Anxiety can be channeled into drive. Sadness can be channeled into empathy. Irritability can be channeled into healthy boundary setting. 

We can also apply this method of channeling to life’s adversities. Of course if given the option we would choose to NOT experience trauma or adversity. Unfortunately, life does not always give us this option. What we can choose to do is learn and grow through adversity. This is often easier said than done, but it is possible. Therapy can help. 

Finding the Right Therapist

It takes a lot of courage to get help when confronted with challenges or adversity. It’s a big step to seek counseling, and even more so to find the right therapist whom you can trust with your innermost thoughts and feelings.

At Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC, there are skilled, licensed contracted counselors and therapists who can work with you to help transform your negative experiences into positive growth. Call today to get started.

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