Everyone has gone through big life changes. They can be predictable, such as marriage or relocating to a new place, or unpredictable, such as the illness, injury, or death of a loved one. When a major change happens, transition naturally follows, requiring you to move on and begin something new.

An important life transition closes a chapter in life and opens a new one. It can mean longing for how things were before the change happened, or embarking on new opportunities. It is often difficult, and may be accompanied by intense feelings of fear, doubt, uncertainty, and resistance. Small changes are easily overcome, but the larger ones may challenge you.

Experiencing Life Changes

Transitions in life are passages to a new beginning or perspective. In every transition, there is the need to let go of an old belief or practice and replace it with something new. Entering into a new world can be anxiety-provoking because it tests your competence to adjust. This period is marked by discomfort and disconnection from the environment and even from yourself.

It’s natural to feel anxious when entering the unknown or unfamiliar, but if you’re trapped in this phase, the overwhelming feelings may send you spinning down into emotional turmoil. Some changes, such as a breakup or death of a loved one, involve loss and grief. The anxiety and trauma of this time may lead to drug or alcohol use as a way of numbing the crushing feelings. Whatever the cause, a transition is always an excellent opportunity to seek counseling to help you take stock of your life and enter a new chapter with less pain and resistance.

Taking on the Challenge of Handling Life Transitions

Transitions are difficult because there is always the conscious or unconscious tendency to avoid change. The basic human self-preservation instinct is to resist anything new or unfamiliar. Even positive changes like a job promotion, pregnancy, or winning the lottery can cause stress. Simply put, what is unknown can make you uncomfortable.

For example, if you’ve reached retirement age, it is ideal to spend your time relaxing and enjoying the fruits of your long years of toil. Retirement, however, may challenge your long held practices and beliefs. Now that you’re retired, you may feel completely lost without a daily work routine to follow. The transition may disrupt your self-confidence and, as a result, you may experience low self-esteem and identity issues. When not resolved, these can lead to depression and physical illness.

If you just became new parents, you’ve been in a transitional period ever since the baby was conceived. You’re not just a couple anymore, but parents with expectations to meet. This can create emotional distress for one or both parents as you try to make both your marriage and parenthood work. If you’re successful, it becomes an important milestone in your life; if you resist, the marriage may suffer, and the help of a counselor may be required.

If you’re a parent who raised children who are now leaving to make their own lives, you may experience a common transition called empty nest syndrome. Seeing the young ones move out of the family home after taking care of them for many years may make you feel disconnected. This transition offers many opportunities for parents like you, but it can also be difficult to form a new identity at this point in your life. If you’re depressed and withdrawn, it’s time to seek professional intervention.

Accepting Change without Resistance

Life may not always be fair, but sometimes, unexpected good comes out of an overwhelming experience that brings a major life change. Change cannot be avoided as life goes on. Transitions are probably the most difficult episodes in anybody’s life, but ignoring or resisting them can only prolong the difficulties and make life more painful to endure. When you’re unable to pass through a transition and it’s having an emotional or physical impact in many aspects of your life, it’s time to get outside help.

Whether it is a positive or negative change, you need a listening ear, a supportive hand, and a safe environment to help you accept it and move on to enjoy your life. At Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC, independently contracted therapists who specialize in transitions counseling are waiting to offer all of these as they work with you. You’ll be matched with the right counselor who can help identify and resolve the adjustment issues that prevent you from moving forward. Call now to request an appointment.

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