Understanding your Child’s Life Transitions: The First Step to Enabling a Fulfilling Childhood

Everyone has to face changes at different points in their life. Whether gradual or abrupt, these changes, or transitions, are passages from one stage to another. The ability to accept and handle change is an important component of a person’s emotional health. This capacity is shaped by the combination of a person’s nature, upbringing, and circumstances.

Today’s children may have more complicated lives than their counterparts in the past, and they go through various transitions that can have an impact on their development. Whether they are exciting times of new opportunities and growth, or times of uncertainty, transitions are part of an ongoing journey that calls for adjustment and resilience.

Some children are able to adjust to change with minimal effort. Others, however, may find it tough to manage life transitions that come their way. During this time, the support and care of reliable adults, particularly parents, are important to help children deal with their difficult thoughts and feelings. If these children fail to get the response and assistance they need to manage these intense emotions, they may be thrown off course. On the other hand,
understanding children’s life transitions can make a big difference in helping them have a fulfilling childhood.

When Your Child Is Experiencing Transition

All changes are accompanied by an assortment of feelings: anticipation, anxiety, confusion, curiosity, excitement, fear, and uncertainty. Any change can make your child feel challenged or even threatened. Studies have shown that many experiences from the past are buried in the recesses of our minds and resurrected during situations that resemble them.

“Transitions are stressful for children and young people, just as they are for adults,”
says Young Minds. A number of studies confirm what many parents and mental health practitioners have long recognized—transitions are tense experiences that can have far-reaching effects on a child’s well-being in various ways:

  • Emotional: experiences such as the death of a loved one or parents’ divorce
  • Physical: relocation to a new address or moving to a new school
  • Physiological: undergoing bodily changes (puberty or adolescence) or chronic illness

The more unstructured, unexpected, or incomprehensible a transition is, the more disoriented and unable to adjust your child may feel. You may be inclined to think that crying or having a tantrum is just a way for your child to demand attention when faced with difficulties, but this is not necessarily true. If you discover the underlying reason, you can find out what your child is trying to tell you and provide the help he or she needs.

What to Expect

If your child is going through a change, whether welcomed or unexpected, it is normal for him or her to feel some amount of uncertainty and doubt. There are several common stages of reaction to transitions: immobilization, denial, sadness, guilt, acting out new behaviors, reflecting on the change, and internalizing the new learning.

As a parent, it is important to look out for signs that indicate your child is having difficulties with transitions so that you can help and journey with your child. If you notice your child is often overwhelmed by emotions, as manifested in the form of confusion, distraction, withdrawal, or a full-blown meltdown, it is definitely beneficial to get professional help for your child.

Where to Find Help

No matter how good a parent you are, you can’t always shield your child from difficulties and suffering. It is distressing to witness your child struggle to adjust to a recent change, and you may also find yourself short of patience in responding to your child during transitions. The solution is seeking professional intervention; according to Good Therapy, “speaking with a therapist before any significant changes in life occur may be warranted,” as it can provide invaluable help before a problem has a chance to arise.

The counselors independently contracted with Carolina Counseling
Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC, have experience and training in child adjustment issues, and they want to help you and your child find solutions to these difficulties. One of these counselors is the right-fit professional who can help your child explore, express, and better understand his or her emotions in a safe and comfortable setting. In the process, your child will learn to adjust to life’s ups and downs and achieve a fulfilling childhood.

As a parent, you may find it beneficial as well to have a nonjudgmental listener to unload your burden or lift your spirits. Talking about your innermost thoughts in a nurturing environment with a nonpartisan person who understands, rather than being blamed or receiving unsolicited advice, provides insight and makes you feel good. Both you and your child can receive support and guidance in navigating the difficult emotional terrain of life transitions.

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