Understanding Child Guilt
and What You Can Do

Children’s experiences can be used as a positive source of lessons by parents to motivate their brood to better their behavior. Many child psychologists believe that the past can serve a good purpose for learning a lot of positive values, but not guilt.

Guilt is negative, but many parents may not be aware of that. What most adults know is its power in keeping their young wards in line. It is something that many grownups use to have an easier time with children. It is true that it can impart a lesson on making amends or reparation, but this lesson is dwarfed by the harm that guilt can do to your child.

The Psychology of Guilt

Adult guilt is often a result of childhood experience. These can be learned from people they trust – parents, family, friends, and teachers. Even society and religion can consciously or unconsciously reinforce guilt. As a child becomes guilty, it becomes easier for adults to make them “toe the line,” making them more cooperative and obedient.

Regardless of the purpose, unhealthy and excessive guilt can make a child become an anxious thinker. As such, they can be filled with a lot of negative manifestations, such as timidity, fright, shame, fear, wakefulness, low self-esteem, indecisiveness and lack of initiative.

The Guilt That Persists

Guilt as a way to control children works because of simple psychology: children want to please their parents and teachers to get love, approval and acceptance. This is the reason it is being used by many adults. In truth, however, guilt is merely a quick fix to stop their child from misbehaving momentarily.

What they may fail to recognize is the kind of permanent or long-term emotional damage it can cause a child, after internalizing the guilt. The feeling of unhealthy guilt can prevent anyone, even an adult, from being productive. Imagine what it can do to a child who doesn’t have the ability to filter their emotions and choose which to internalize and which to discard.

Undoing What Was Done?

As your child develops excessive/unhealthy guilt and becomes an anxious thinker, you would want to undo the damage, but that may not be as easy. If it is stopping your child from working their way towards their life’s dreams and aspirations, do the next best thing – call Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC.

Your efforts to empower and make your child self-sufficient may be rendered useless, if he/she is carrying a heavy emotional load because of unhealthy guilt. Don’t let your child carry the baggage of guilt to adulthood. Make a difference now by bringing in professional assistance from CCS.

We can Help! Call NOW!

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