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Strengthening a Committed Relationship with Counseling


Strengthening a Committed Relationship with Counseling


Any committed relationship, regardless of legal status, experiences difficulties. The truth is there is no such thing as a perfect relationship, but every couple can benefit from marriage counseling or couples counseling when problems are rocking the foundation of their bond. While some may have intrinsic skills to resolve their concerns, many couples lack the ability to alter the negative direction. It can come to a point that partners become at a loss and profoundly disappointed so much that they either decide to separate or get a divorce.


Signs of a Troubled Relationship

A marital relationship filled with distressing concerns is very unsettling. The way couples handle problems may progressively turn things from bad to worse. Most frequently, high levels of distress can result in arguments that don’t end with a resolution. As a result, couples may stop communicating and doing pleasurable things for each other. In other cases, a great feeling of disconnection, contempt and withdrawal exists between people who are simply worn out and don’t care anymore. These clearly suggest that a marriage is in desperate trouble and running the risk of divorce.

Marital distress is also largely present in serious, long-term, committed relationships. Often, the problems lie on everyday issues in the relationship, such as intimacy, parenting, communication and finances. The nuisances may begin with partners lacking a good sense of how to be in a relationship, how to communicate, or how to provide support. Couples may do well initially in the early phases of their romance, but begin to show signs of distress as time goes.

Whether problems are directly the result of difficulties in raising children, substance abuse, or extramarital affairs, marital distress has long-lasting emotional and behavioral effects on partners. When not addressed with professional help, the downward progression can ultimately result in the end of the relationship.


The Value of Marriage or Couples Counseling

The good news is that all couples can benefit from effective counseling. In fact, people in a harmonious relationship also find the value of seeking help from professionals to provide marriage counseling or couples counseling for daily concerns and to resolve issues that have felt unresolvable. These terms are often used interchangeably to refer to a form of therapy that aims to improve a committed relationship.

If a difference is to be made clear, it lies in what relationship a couple wishes to strengthen. Marriage counseling is specifically offered to married couples for the purpose of reinforcing the institution of a legal union experiencing marital distress. In contrast, couples counseling is sought by two people within a relationship.

With marriage or couples counseling, the many aspects of a relationship are addressed in a safe and supportive environment. It is an opportunity to be guided by a professional with no preconceived notions of the couple’s identity. During counseling sessions, couples are helped to communicate constructively in expressing feelings, ideas and behaviors and learn to resolve the issues that they haven’t been thus far able to get past. Counselors can be essential in understanding what the root issues are (and the resolution of those issues), resolution of conflicts, and increased emotional/mental/behavioral intimacy. Overcoming these problems together can eventually save the relationship.


The Right Time to Seek Counseling

Couples seek counseling for various reasons, ranging from power struggles to domestic abuse and blended family issues. Counseling is recommended as soon as discontent is felt in a relationship. However, studies show that, on the average, partners tend to forego counseling and settle unhappily for at least six years.

Experts reveal that the longer issues are allowed to persist, the more difficult it becomes to repair the relationship. Seeking help earlier has greater chances of saving the relationship, but waiting too long to get counseling may turn the odds against you. Still, counseling is pursued by many couples as a respectable and amicable way to end the relationship – especially when children are involved an effective/positive communication must be maintained.


How Counseling can Help Improve Relationships

Marriage or couples counseling can help people in all types of intimate relationships. However, some couples hold their reservations for not seeking the kind of counseling that would work to make their relationship satisfying again. The effectiveness of counseling is presented on the following perspectives:

  • Relationship skills are learned. Many couples refuse counseling because they feel they can fix the situation on their own. The truth is, you may not have the ability to fix everything to maintain the relationship. There are individual patterns and differences carried over to a marriage, making it difficult to treat marital distress. The willingness to get professional help is not only a sign of courage, but also a commitment to preserve the relationship.
  • Keeping a marriage/relationship is a team work. No one wants to take the blame, but instead partners point fingers at each other as the one with problems. If your partner has a problem you need to be part of the solution. Blaming will not resolve the problem. A competent counselor is what you need to help your partner and you to realistically address issues and find solutions.
  • Counseling is a process. Many couples feel embarrassed to share personal issues with another person. This may be true at the onset of counseling, especially when disagreements happen in front of a stranger. Trust a skillful therapist to create a warm and secured environment for getting to the root causes and helping you resolve them.
  • Counseling is worth your money. Most couples think that counseling can drain their finances. Counseling can require you to invest money in exchange for making your relationship work again. There’s significantly higher cost later if you fail to take action and seek counseling, not to mention expensive divorce and the emotional toll it may cost to everyone involved.


** For married couples, it is important to note that most insurances pay for “family” counseling. This means that one individual has symptoms that meet criteria for a diagnosis like anxiety, depression, adjustment issues, etc. Many times what is happening between the married couple contributes to these, so counseling helps alleviate symptoms and improves not only the relationship, but also the daily functioning of the person who is experiencing unpleasant symptoms. Family counseling is when the client brings in at least one other family member to resolve issues that will help the client function. Whether you call it family counseling or marriage counseling, getting issues resolved where you feel better mentally and emotionally is essential.

Just like anything beneficial, marriage or couples counseling involves hard work. You need to approach it with a realistic and positive attitude. It’s not all a counselor’s work, but for the couples as well. Participation is important as it means the willingness to learn new, productive habits and unlearn bad attitude. The road to change is difficult, but everything is worth your effort.


Seeking Counseling Together as a Couple

The process works best if both partners participate in the counseling sessions. It’s a chance for couples to gain a new perspective of their relationship guided by someone with skills and training. As counseling progresses, couples are able to learn and use ways to overcome problems and face the future with positive expectations together.

In some cases, a partner may be reluctant to seek counseling even if it’s essential to save a bad relationship. While not ideal, you can proceed with counseling alone and begin to fix some of the marital distress yourself. A competent therapist will be able to provide useful ideas about improving the relationship by helping you resolve your issues, change yourself and your perspective. As you effect the changes, your partner may begin to see the fruits and later agree to enter therapy with you.


Benefiting from Good Counseling

Whether or not your partner agrees to go with you, deciding to get marriage or couples counseling is an implication of your steadfastness to save your relationship no matter what it costs you. The independently contracted counselors with Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC will not disappoint you.

Take the first step to get the kind of relationship that will make you feel loved, respected, secured and contented. Experience the benefits of marriage or couples counseling from Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC. Call now to request an appointment.


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Confidential / Private Sessions

Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC contracts with Licensed professional counselors/therapists/psychologists that provide a friendly, relaxed atmosphere. Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC contracts with friendly, caring therapists who assist adult individuals, couples, families, and children with resolving issues and getting back to enjoying their lives. Whether you are non-military or military, it will always been a pleasure to work with you. CCS and the independently contracted therapists are able and happy to assist active duty dependents and retired military and their families.

Serving Areas: Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC

Counties: Wake County NC

Cities: Fuquay-Varina NC, Holly Springs NC, Angier NC, Duncan NC, Chalybeate Springs NC, Feltonville NC, Garner NC, Kennebec NC, Willow Springs NC, Cokesbury NC, Holland NC, Wilbon NC, Apex NC

Zip Codes: 27501, 27502, 27523, 27526, 27529, 27539, 27540, 27592

We are located at:

Carolina Counseling Services - Fuquay-Varina, NC
602 E. Academy St. Ste. 103
Fuquay-Varina, NC 27526

(910) 624-6973

602 E. Academy St. Suite 102

Fuquay-Varina, NC 27526

Our Mailing Address:

PO BOX 9909
Fayetteville, NC 28311

How Do I Set Up my FIRST Appointment?

  • Call: (910) 624-6973 (Fastest way to schedule)
  • Text: (910) 308-3291 (Reply will be via phone)
  • Click here and use our Contact Form (You must include your phone number, because replies will only be made by telephone to ensure security/privacy)
  • Call or Text for your New Patient Appointment Anytime!
  • Appointment scheduling for NEW clients: Mon-Fri 8:30am-5:15pm
  • New client appts may be scheduled when therapists have openings, which may include daytime, evenings and weekends.
  • Established/Standing Appointments are made directly with your therapist!
  • Referrals: MOST beneficiaries do NOT need a Referral!

View the independently contracted, Caring, Licensed Therapists. Who is the Best Fit for you?

  • Kimberly Tran, PhD, HSP-P

    Specializes in: (Ages 18+) Individuals, Couples, anxiety, PTSD, trauma (adults who have experienced childhood physical, emotional and/or sexual abuse, Wounded Warrior) grief and loss, relationship issues, addiction, recovery, co-occuring substance abuse, couple/marital concerns, personality disorders, mood disorders.
    Insurance: BCBS, Tricare (to include Tricare Prime), Medicare and cash
    Location: Fuquay-Varina, NC

  • Laura Coyle, PhD, HSP-P

    Specializes in: (Ages 3+) Children, Adolescents, Couples, Individuals, Family, anxiety, persistent sadness and depression, mood swings, responses to trauma, grief, behavioral concerns, autism spectrum disorders, attention difficulties, excessive procrastination, challenges related to physical health concerns, relational conflicts, problematic alcohol or drug use, problematic eating patterns, communication difficulties, Affirmative and Multiculturally Competent Counseling, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.
    Insurance: BCBS, Tricare (to include Tricare Prime) Medicare and cash

    Credit Cards: Visa, Mastercard, Discover and American Express

    Location: Fuquay-Varina, NC

  • Teshia Utley-McKoy, MS, LPC

    Specializes in: (Ages 4+) Children, Adolescents, Individuals, Marriage and Couples counseling, Anxiety issues, Parent-child relational issues, Spirituality, Behavior Management, ADHD, ODD, PTSD Trauma, Self-Esteem, Depression, Grief and Loss, Adjustment and Transitional Issues, Coping Skills, Christian counseling.
    Insurance: BCBS, Tricare (to include Tricare Prime), HSA/FSA and cash

    Credit Cards: Visa, Mastercard, Discover and American Express

    Location: Fuquay-Varina, NC

  • Rachel Macko, LCSW

    Specializes in: (Ages 18+) Adults, Individuals, Anxiety, Panic Disorder, OCD, Depression, Mood Disorders, PTSD, Trauma, Acute Stress Disorder, Chronic Pain/Health Concerns, Grief and Loss, Adjustment/Transitional Issues, Coping issues, Sleep Issues, Communication issues. Mindfulness Training and EMDR are available.
    Insurance: BCBS, Medicare, Tricare Prime/Select, Cash, HSA and FSA accepted

    Credit Cards: Visa, Mastercard, Discover and American Express

    Location: Fuquay-Varina, NC
  • Sherry Horowitz, LCSW

    Specializes in: (Ages 10+) Children, Adolescents/Teens, Adults, Individuals, Couples, Families, Communication Skills, Mood Disorders, Adjustment Disorders, ADHD, Couples/Marriage Counseling, Grief and Loss, Parenting Issues, Panic Attacks, Issues Related to Military Families, Self-Esteem, Sleep Issues, Positive Behavior Modification, Eating Disorders, Anxiety or Fears, Depression, Self-esteem, Body Image Issues, Grief and loss, ADHD in girls and women
    Insurance: BCBS, Medicare, Tricare, HSA/FSA and cash

    Credit Cards: Visa, Mastercard, Discover and American Express

    Location: Fuquay-Varina, NC
  • Aisha Alston, MA, LPC

    Specializes in: (Ages 8+) Children, Adolescents, Teens, Adults, Families, Couples, Communication Issues, Parenting Issues, Mood Disorders, Thought Disorders, Anxiety, Depression, Panic Attacks, Relationship Issues, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Conflict Issues, Grief/Loss, Adjustment Disorder, LGBT, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Oppositional Defiance Disorder, Conduct disorder
    Insurance: BCBS, Tricare and Cash

    Credit Cards: Visa, Mastercard, Discover and American Express

    Location: Fuquay-Varina, NC