Stopping Anxiety
From Hurting Your Marriage

When you are married, you have to face the reality that you are binding yourself to someone. Love is probably the most powerful emotion in that bond. When anxiety starts to manifest in your spouse or yourself, however, it can have a profound impact on your relationship and the quality of your life. Undoubtedly, when anxiety is present, you will do anything to stop it from hurting your marriage.

Anyone married to someone with anxiety disorder can attest to how much the condition can affect a relationship on a day-to-day basis. While the disorder can have a variety of negative effects, it can be particularly hazardous to the health of a romantic relationship.

What Anxiety Can Do to Paralyze Your Relationship

A study conducted by the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) assessed the impact of generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) on relationships. Although the study specifically focused on GAD, the findings reveal that all other forms of anxiety disorders can also hurt a marriage. The ADAA study serves as an eye-opener for couples experiencing the challenges of anxiety in committed relationships.

According to the ADAA study, a spouse with anxiety is less likely to have a healthy and supportive relationship with their partner, as compared to people without the disorder. A marriage where one or both spouses have an anxiety condition is two times more likely to have at least one relationship problem, such as regular arguments and social withdrawal. The anxious partner is also three times more likely to avoid being intimate with their significant other.

Anxiety can make the world terrifying for the affected spouse, hindering their ability to maintain a job, open up to others, and try out new experiences. The overwhelming feeling can impel the anxious spouse to build up emotional walls as protection from the perceived harm lurking around every corner, making it impossible to form the bond essential for a happy marriage.

The self-absorbing attitude created by anxiety becomes another thing to lament for the spouse with the condition. The irrational fear makes the anxious spouse unable to see past their own self; they may wallow in self-pity and try to convince their partner that the condition is beyond help.
Anxiety in marriage presents a challenge for the other half trying to help and care for the loved one with anxiety. Over time, this can give rise to difficult feelings, such as frustration, resentment, anger, sadness, guilt, or hopelessness, which may strain the marriage too much for it to survive.

Being Married to a Person with an Anxiety Disorder

Struggling with anxiety involves a great deal of personal distress and a mixture of feelings. It is equally difficult for the non-anxious partner, who may play the unwanted role of being the compromiser, protector, and comforter. The extra responsibilities can be very stressful not only for the relationship, but for their physical and emotional health.

As the spouse of someone with anxiety, don’t consider it selfish to take care of yourself while you look after your partner. It is important to focus on your own care to help you neutralize the highly emotional situation. Maintaining your well-being can help you remain strong, calm, and responsible when you need to cover more than your share of household chores. You may also consider the benefits of counseling if anxiety is hurting your marriage.

Getting Help for Someone You Love

The presence of a psychological condition, such as an anxiety disorder, in your spouse can have profound effects on your marriage. It does not mean, though, that your relationship is doomed. Thankfully, anxiety disorders are better understood today and treatment options are available to manage them.

If you or your spouse have an anxiety disorder that is disrupting your marriage and quality of life, you have the power to seek help. It can be difficult to convince your partner to seek diagnosis and treatment, but you need to secure professional help if anxiety is present in your marriage.

If anxiety is strangling your marriage and breeding fear, isolation, and resentment in you and/or your spouse, take advantage of the available help. Carolina Counseling Services – Fuquay-Varina, NC independently contracts with counselors who have expertise and experience in helping couples whose marriages are affected by anxiety disorders. Just talking about how anxiety grips your marriage can be liberating. The right-fit therapist awaits you in a caring environment to listen and become your trusted ally during this nerve-wracking time.

Feel free to call CCS – Fuquay-Varina, NC, to schedule an appointment. The future of your marriage is in your hands!

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